There is not a man who would have never experienced loneliness. This feeling can be very difficult, especially if caused by the death of a loved one, illness, job loss, or divorce. Blogger Tony Bernard divided 10 ways, which helped her to brighten up this time.
"In 2001 doctors diagnosed me a serious illness and had to leave the post of professor of law at the University of California. That's when I learned what real loneliness. That's what helped me survive this period, "- says Tony Bernard.
1. Do not feel guilty
It is most important! The feeling of guilt will only aggravate the situation, will make you feel anything not capable. Many of the causes and events brought you to this state. Yes, you could not prevent what happened, but in your power to find a way out of this situation.
2. to take pleasure in the simple things
It could be anything: your favorite food, book, TV show, chat with the pet. Go for a walk or just sit on the street next to the house. Experiment! Find things that brighten up leisure time and help to feel better. Do not deny yourself small pleasures.
3. Think of the old friend
Loneliness makes you feel unnecessary. We are inconvenient to disturb friends, take their time, to distract from the really important things. Sometimes, to call someone or even just write a letter, we have to literally overstep themselves. Do it!
Write or call a friend or a former school classmate. Talk to those with whom you have not spoken for years. At first it may seem that there are no such people. Think again. A childhood friend? A friend with a first job? Thanks to social networks is now possible to find anyone and then send the message.
4. Head CREATIVE HOBBIES
It need not be something unusual, extraordinary. You can just paint the mandala, embroider scheme, crochet, or make collages from old magazines. I helped a variety of puzzles and mosaics.
Think that might distract you from sad thoughts.
5. to help the needy
Become a volunteer, go to the children's home, a shelter for animals or a hospice. There's always a need assistants. Organize your collection of things for the poor start to the financial help charities. When we do something for others, we feel useful and important (this is the first step to victory over loneliness). In addition, so you'll be less fixated on themselves and their experiences.
6. to communicate with someone who also feel lonely
Between people who are experiencing similar feelings, always set a special bond. Talk to the man who is now in a similar situation (for example, also going through a divorce or lost a job, to which he devoted all his life).
This companion can be found on online forums, or through a friend. Support your "friend in distress", wish good luck, offer assistance. When you realize that you are not alone in your condition, it will feel much easier. At least, it helped me.
7. Rejoice FOR OTHER
"This practice I call" The joy for others makes me happy. " Think about the people who are now, where you want to be: in the seaside resort, a party or a football match. Imagine that you are there with them. Even if this fantasy will last only 2-3 minutes, it will make you feel happy, ease the pain of loneliness, cheer up "- advises Tony Bernard.
8. DO SOLITUDE his friend
Treat loneliness as an old friend, who suddenly came to visit, although it has not received an invitation. Sometimes I do and say, "Hi, loneliness! So we met again. Long time it was not you. "
The same principle works in relation to other negative emotions: anxiety, anger, envy. Do not resist, but rather try to understand and accept. So these feelings become less acute, and you can quickly get rid of them.
9. Remind yourself that this is a temporary
The poet Rainer Maria Rilke wrote. "No feeling is not completely" Repeat this phrase. Tomorrow is a new day and you'll feel differently. Perhaps things will change radically. Sometimes it seems that loneliness with us forever. But this is not the case.
"I tried, and I helped. Have your favorite artist will accompany you. Sing karaoke with or without music. It is impossible to feel lonely when you sing. I checked it on themselves ", - said Tony Bernard.